Escape to Paradise: Unwind at Tsurumi Spa Resort, Beppu, Japan
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into a review of [Insert Hotel Name Here]. And let me tell you, this is gonna be less a meticulously crafted brochure and more a rambling, caffeinated chat with your slightly-too-opinionated aunt. I'm gonna hit every single detail you threw at me, even those slightly-obsessive-compulsive “is there a window that opens?” types of queries. Prepare for the truth, the whole truth, and maybe a little bit of embellished truth.
First Impressions: Accessibility & Ease (Or, Will My Wheelchair Get Stuck in a Doorway?)
Let's kick off with the stuff that actually matters: accessibility. Look, I'm not in a wheelchair, but I am a champion of inclusivity, and let's be honest, a lot of hotels fall flat. They say they have "facilities for disabled guests" and you end up with a ramp that's steeper than a mountain goat's backside.
Here's what I found (or, what I expect to find based on my research – I can’t physically be there yet, sadly, but consider this my psychic hotel reconnaissance trip). [Insert Hotel Name Here] claims to have the goods. They shout about "wheelchair accessible" and "elevator" and "facilities for disabled guests." Great! Now, the devil's in the details, right? I'd need to see:
- The Ramps: Gentle slopes, people! No death-defying inclines.
- The Doors: Wide enough. I'm picturing that awkward moment when you jam the wheelchair and have to yell for help. Nope.
- The Bathrooms: Grab bars, roll-in showers (not those tiny, claustrophobic ones), and enough space to maneuver.
- On-site Restaurants/Lounges: Accessible seating options.
- Overall Navigation: Easy to move around, not a maze of narrow hallways and treacherous steps.
Important Note (and a Whimsy): I am dying to know if the "shrine" is accessible. I mean, a shrine! Is it inside? Outside? Do I have to crawl? (Just kidding… mostly.)
Internet: Because We Need To Post That Selfie!
Ah, the modern necessity: Internet. We're talking:
- Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Praise the tech gods! Amen! This is huge. No more hunting for the lobby Wi-Fi like a digital scavenger.
- Wi-Fi in public areas: Good for those lounging by the (hopefully accessible) pool.
- Internet [LAN]: Okay, for the serious nerds who like to hardwire in. I respect the commitment.
- Internet Services: Hopefully, this includes printing, maybe even a fax machine. (Do people still fax? I have no idea.)
Things to Do & Ways to Relax: Let's Get Pampered (or, Faceplant by the Pool)
This is the juicy stuff. The "treat yourself" section.
- Swimming Pool: Outdoor, hopefully with a view. I need to see if it's not a shallow, kid-infested paddling pool. A view, people! And maybe a poolside bar. (See below: Dining, Drinking & Snacking section)
- Pool with view This is the dream. A view of what? Ocean! Mountain! City! I wanna feel like I'm starring in a postcard.
- Spa, Spa/Sauna: I'm a huge spa person. Massages, facials, the whole shebang. They better have a serious spa game.
- Sauna, Steamroom: Yes, please. Get all toasty and detoxify.
- Body Scrub, Body Wrap, Foot Bath: Oh, Lordy. This is the good life stuff. Sign me up, immediately.
- Fitness Center, Gym/Fitness: I'm a gym-avoider, but I admire the commitment. Hopefully, it's well-equipped and not a dusty room with two rusty weights.
Here's a little confession (brace yourselves): I'm terrible at relaxing. I start thinking about laundry when I'm getting a massage. So finding a place where I can actually shut off my brain is crucial. Good spa vibes are essential. This part I'm really hoping they nail.
Cleanliness & Safety: Is My Room a Petri Dish??
In the age of… well, everything, this is paramount. They are claiming to be on top of their sanitation game… But do they really care?
- Anti-viral cleaning products: Good start!
- Daily disinfection in common areas: Yay!
- Room sanitization opt-out available: Important! Some people have to be sensitive to products.
- Rooms sanitized between stays: Essential.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: Must-have.
- Safe dining setup: Physical distancing, etc. I hope that means the tables aren't crammed together.
- Sanitized kitchen and tableware items: Please!
- Hand sanitizer: Everywhere, please!
- First aid kit: Always a good idea.
- Doctor/nurse on call: Peace of mind.
The whole “cleanliness” portion of the review is the essential one.
Dining, Drinking & Snacking: Fueling the Adventure (or, Where's the Food??)
This is where I get serious. I live to eat. And travel is always an excuse to indulge.
- Restaurants (plural!): Excellent! Variety is the spice of life.
- A la carte in restaurant/Buffet in restaurant/Alternative meal arrangement: Options are key!
- Asian cuisine in restaurant/International cuisine in restaurant/Western cuisine in restaurant: I like a little fusion, a little adventure. A good hotel restaurant needs to be more than just "safe" food.
- Breakfast in room/Breakfast takeaway service/Breakfast service/Western Breakfast/Asian breakfast: Because sometimes you just want to eat in your pajamas. And sometimes, you need to grab and go.
- Coffee/tea in restaurant/Coffee shop: Coffee, coffee, coffee. Essential.
- Poolside bar: See above.
- Bar: Cocktails, people! Cocktails!
- Room service [24-hour]: Bless you. My life is now complete.
- Desserts in restaurant/Salad in restaurant/Soup in restaurant: Important details.
- Snack bar: Because sometimes you just need a quick bite.
- Bottle of water: Hydration is key.
- Happy hour: Yay! A great way to sample the bar.
My Biggest Curiosity: Are the restaurants actually good? So many hotel restaurants are bland and forgettable. I want a meal that I'll remember, that I'll Instagram, that I'll tell stories about. Here's the thing: If they have a truly amazing chef, the hotel will be a slam dunk.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things Matter (or, Where Do I Put My Luggage?)
- Air conditioning in public area/Air conditioning in all rooms: Necessity.
- Business facilities: For the grown-ups needing to do grown-up things.
- Cash withdrawal: Handy!
- Concierge: Will they actually help me? Or just tell me to Google it?
- Convenience store: For the forgotten toothbrush and late-night snacks.
- Currency exchange: Useful for travelers.
- Daily housekeeping: Give me fresh towels and a made bed. Please.
- Doorman: That's the life. (Though I can probably do the carrying myself.)
- Dry cleaning/Ironing service/Laundry service: Because wrinkles are the enemy.
- Elevator: Essential.
- Luggage storage: Freedom!
- Meeting/banquet facilities/Seminars/Meetings: Are these well designed with accessibility in mind and good AV equipment?
- Safety deposit boxes: Important for valuables.
- Terrace: Relaxing!
- Wi-Fi for special events: Great for networking events.
- Xerox/fax in business center: Still a thing!
For the Kids: Family Friendly (or, Please Don't Cry on My Vacation)
- Babysitting service: A lifesaver for parents.
- Family/child friendly/Kids facilities/Kids meal: Kids are good and fun!
Access & Security: Keeping Me Safe (or, What if the Hotel Burns Down?)
- CCTV in common areas/CCTV outside property/Security [24-hour]: Makes me feel safe.
- **Check-in/out [
Alright, buckle up, buttercups and let's get this show on the road! This isn't your cookie-cutter, perfectly polished travel itinerary. This is real life, people – with all the hiccups, delicious smells, and questionable decisions that go with it. And this time, it’s all about my chaotic, wonderful, and potentially prune-filled journey to the Resort Stay Spa Tsurumi in Beppu, Japan.
PRE-TRIP PANIC & PREPARATION… or, the Chaos Begins Before I Even Leave Home:
- Month Before: Okay, so I booked this trip MONTHS ago. I was SO organized. I packed my sensible hiking boots… and then promptly forgot where I put them. Cue frantic cupboard-rummaging at 2 AM. Also, did I remember to renew my passport? (Spoiler: I did! Miraculously.)
- Week Before: Bought ALL the Japanese phrasebooks. I'll be fluent by the time I get there! (Narrator: They weren't.) Tried to learn a few basic phrases. Got stuck on "Where is the toilet?" for, oh, about 45 minutes. My dog, Winston, seemed deeply concerned.
- Day Before: Panic-packing. You know, cramming everything you might need (like a hazmat suit, you just never know) into a suitcase designed for a weekend getaway. Realized I was out of travel adapters. Curse you, international electrical systems!
- Departure Day: Airport chaos. Lines, delays, the existential dread of airline peanuts. Did I turn off the iron? Did I lock the front door? Did I leave Winston enough food? Probably not.
DAY 1: Arrival & The "Lost in Translation" Olympics
- Morning (aka, the long, endless flight): Slept for about three hours. Watched terrible in-flight movies. Ate questionable airplane food. Developed a deep, abiding love for the tiny, individually wrapped biscuits.
- Afternoon (Beppu Arrival): Okay, Japan! The air smells different – cleaner, somehow? – which is already a win. Finding the shuttle to Tsurumi was a minor adventure. My Japanese skills peaked at a bewildered shrug and frantic pointing. Eventually, success! Or, at least, I think it was the right shuttle. Hope so!
- Late Afternoon (Resort Check-in): The resort is stunning! Like, postcard-worthy stunning. The lobby smells like… well, like money and serenity. Except, immediately hit a snag. Turns out my reservation had a typo. My name is not “Herr Von Snuggles.” Deep breaths. Eventually, after much charade-ing and the sheer force of my American charm (read: exasperated gesturing), I was in! Room: gorgeous. View: breathtaking. Heart: Slightly racing from the adventure.
- Evening (Initial Exploration & Dinner Disaster): Tried to find the onsen (hot spring). Got lost. Wandered around for a solid 20 minutes, feeling like a particularly confused tourist. Found it! And oh my god, the onsen is amazing! The hot water melted away all the travel stress. The stars at night!
- Dinner – Disaster. Decided to be adventurous and order something that looked like noodles. Turns out it was… not noodles. Some kind of weird, gelatinous thing that I poked at with my chopsticks for a good 10 minutes before admitting defeat. Ate more bread. The bread was good.
DAY 2: Onsen Overload & Ramen Revelations
- Morning (Onsen Immersion): Back to the onsen! This time, I knew the drill. The ritualistic washing. The soothing heat. The utter bliss of floating in volcanic waters. Seriously, I could live in that onsen. Pure, unadulterated happiness. Might have accidentally fallen asleep.
- Mid-morning (Failed Hike Attempt): Decided to be active. Tried to hike a nearby trail. Got lost. Again. The trails weren't marked very well. Admired the scenery and the birds instead
- Lunch (Ramen Triumph): Found a tiny ramen shop in the village. The smell alone was enough to make me weep tears of joy. Ordered a bowl of the best ramen I've ever tasted. Seriously, it was a religious experience. The broth! The noodles! The perfectly poached egg! My taste buds did a little jig. I might have slurped rather loudly. No regrets.
- Afternoon (Spa Pampering…or, the Gentle Torture of a Facial): Booked a spa treatment. A facial. I'm not normally a spa person, but hey, I'm on vacation. The facial. The woman was very nice, but I have no idea what the products were. My face was scrubbed, massaged, and prodded until I looked like a slightly smoother, happier, alien. It was… an experience.
- Evening (Sunset Views & Dinner Fiasco, Part 2): Watched the sunset from a balcony. Absolutely stunning. Ate leftovers from lunch.
DAY 3: Volcanic Wonders & Cultural Clumsiness
- Morning (Hell Tour!): Beppu is famous for its "Hells" (hot springs with different colors and properties). Visited a few. First one: the “Blood Pond Hell” which looked like something out of a horror movie. Fascinating, but slightly unsettling. Also, the "Sea Hell" which was a gorgeous blue. Learned a bit about geysers. Made a mental note to never fall into one.
- Mid-day (Pottery Painting Mishap): Decided to be creative and paint pottery. Disaster, part one. I am not an artist. The pottery ended up looking like a Jackson Pollock painting gone wrong. Disaster, part two: I may or may not have dropped my pottery. Splash
- Afternoon (Food Market Adventure): Went to the local food market. So many weird and wonderful things! Tried some local snacks. Some were delicious. Some were…an adventure. A particularly pungent pickled… something.
- Evening (Ryokan Dinner & Cultural Awkwardness): Had a traditional Ryokan dinner. The presentation was beautiful. Eating with chopsticks still required a bit of concentration. I was trying to be respectful with my movements, but I spilled some tea on my kimono. Realized I had no idea how to fold the kimono properly. Managed to trip over a small decorative rock in my haste to find the bathroom.
DAY 4: Reflections, Departure, and the "I'll Be Back!" Vow
- Morning (Final Onsen & Rambling Thoughts): Last dip in the onsen. Savoring the moment. Thinking about how peaceful and rejuvenating it felt. Realized that I had never been this relaxed in my life.
- Mid-morning (Souvenir Shopping & Wallet Woes): Panic-bought souvenirs for everyone back home. Spent way too much money on things I probably didn’t need.
- Afternoon (Departure): Said goodbye to the resort. Beppu, you were amazing, even with all the hiccups.
- Evening (Memories and the Trip Home): On the plane now. Thinking about all the people I met, what I saw, how I felt… and already planning my return. As the plane soared, I was smiling.
Oh honey, YES. Absolutely, unequivocally YES. The first time I tried to learn pottery? Disaster. Absolute, clay-covered, embarrassing DISASTER. I looked like I'd wrestled a mud monster and lost. I remember thinking, "This is it. My life is now defined by a lopsided, slightly phallic vase."
You're gonna feel lost. You're gonna feel like everyone else 'gets it' and you don't. You're gonna second-guess every decision. That's… normal. Embrace the glorious flailing. It's part of the process. Seriously, it's THE BEST part. It keeps you humble, you know?
Setbacks. Oh, the sweet, soul-crushing symphony of setbacks. The key? Allow yourself a good, solid pity party. Preferably with ice cream. And maybe a slightly too-much-wine. Okay, fine, a *lot* of wine.
Seriously though, after the wallowing (and you deserve it!), dust yourself off. Figure out *why* you messed up. Was it lack of planning? Not enough sleep? Maybe... just maybe... you’re not an expert yet. And then, and this is crucial, try again. Just a tiny little bit, or a big step, even. You gotta keep going. I'm still trying to figure out how to do even a small task.
Okay, here’s a secret: EVERYTHING IS NOT A RACE. Seriously. Stop comparing yourself to the rocket scientists of [insert new skill here]. They probably had a head start, spent more time at it, been at it longer, or are just… different. More talented. Whatever. It's not relevant to *you*.
Your progress is your own. Maybe you're juggling kids and a job while also trying to learn [new skill]. Or maybe you're fighting off a crippling fear of failure. Whatever it is, give yourself grace. Celebrate the tiny wins! Did you make a somewhat-edible dinner? BOOM. Success! Did you write a single line of code? AMAZING! Did you get up the the same time this morning? Win. Be ecstatic about it. The only person you need to "keep up with" is the person you were yesterday.
It's fine! It’s. FINE. Not every experience is meant to be a lifelong love affair. This is okay. This genuinely, actually, is okay. I went through three different ukulele teachers before I figured out I just hated the darn thing. I'm never picking one up again. It was the best decision.
Learning is all about exploration. It's about discovering what clicks, what inspires you, and what… doesn't. If you're miserable, cut your losses. Respectfully, but decisively. Life's too short for things that make you want to throw your laptop against the wall. Or, you know, the ukulele.
Motivation? Oh, that fickle beast. Here's the thing: it waxes and wanes. There will be days, maybe weeks, where you’re practically buzzing with the joy of [Skill]. Then there will be days where the mere thought of it fills you with a soul-deep dread.
On those dread days, the answer is simple: Trick yourself. Set *tiny* goals. Just five minutes of practice. Write one sentence. Cook one single, solitary egg. The hardest part is frequently starting. Once you're in the zone, you’ll probably surprise yourself. And if not? Well, you did *something*. And that, my friend, is infinitely better than nothing.
Another trick? Find a community. A friend who’s also learning. A forum online. Misery loves company. And seeing someone else struggle, and succeed, can be a massive motivator. I once saw a fellow newbie accidentally set their sourdough starter on fire. I felt a little better about my own terrible bread!
Okay, let's be honest, sometimes you ARE bad. And that's… okay. It might not be a matter of skill. Take singing, for instance. I tried, bless my heart, and I can say with absolute certainty that the world is a better place because I don't sing in public. Some things aren't meant to be. Sometimes, you just... suck.
But, and this is a BIG BUT, "bad" doesn't have to be permanent. Maybe you just need more practice. Maybe you need a different approach. Or maybe, and this is perfectly acceptable too, it's not your thing and you decide to try something else. There’s a beauty in embracing your limitations. The people who don’t are the ones who end up making themselves miserable and making others miserable by association. Move on.
Oh. Oh NO. This is where it gets real, right? That time I accidentally deleted the entire first chapter of my novel? Yep. That sucked. Cost me weeks of my life. I had to rebuild it from memory, because I didn't have saves.
First: Breathe. Second: Assess the damage. Is it fixable? Can you mitigate the loss? Can you learn from your mistake? Then, and this is VERY important, forgive yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. And sometimes, those mistakes are expensive. It's part of the journey. Don't let it derail you. Learn, move on, and maybe, just *maybe*, make sure you have a backup system in place next time. Lesson learned, yeah? Maybe not, sometimes I just have to lose the money. It makes it easier to accept.
Burnout. That soul-sucking beast. Listen, if you're feeling the burn, you're pushing too hard. You are human, not a machine. This is not a race or a work project. This is supposed to be fun,Hotels With Kitchen Near Me
